Falafel #3 – In ‘Borgesian’ Move, UN Human Rights Council’s Drafts ‘Mein Kampf Charter’

UN Human Rights

Under pressure from decent people around the world, the UN Human Rights Council recently revealed a new draft of its charter. But, strikingly, according to some linguists, the UN’s top rights body’s new governing document is “word for word identical” to Mein Kampf–the memoirs of Nazi leader, Adolf Hitler.

“It really is quite astonishing,” says UN Human Rights Council President, Gehad al-Gehad. “We do not know how this happened, as each delegation submitted their own articles to be integrated by the Central  Sub-committee for the Re-drafting of the charter. Despite the somewhat Borgesian outcome, I can’t say we’re displeased.”

The charter now opens with the words, “I was a lonely boy,” which can otherwise be found on page 1 of Hitler’s autobiographical book. Representatives at the UN, as well as international experts, are still in disagreement about the meaning of the new charter.

“Look, the notion that this is somehow a coincidence is sheer nonsense.” said renowned MIT linguist, Professor Noam Chomsky. “This is yet another instance of a real-life syntactic scenario expressing the tenets of universal grammar. I’m really not at all surprised.”

But already, some experts are expressing skepticism. One University of California English professor, who asked to remain anonymous for fear of retribution, noted the new UN Human Rights Council charter is in fact not identical to the Nazi leader’s memoirs.

“On page 56 of the charter, you may observe a footnote stipulating that ‘Arab leaders so beloved by their people as to make democracy an insult have, in recent years, been victimized for their righteously robust use of measures of self-defense against the aforesaid network of Jewish agents.’”

According to the professor, “this clearly shows that though this document may connote logical equivalence, the notion that it denotes any sort of logical identity is simply laughable.”

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